6 Cents on Speed Dating

Back in my day, speed dating was really speed dating. The girls parked their cars in the corner of the McDonald's parking lot and tried to get the guys who sped around the parking lot to stop. Big smiles, bright-eyes, and of course cute clothing accentuating all the right body parts sure did help with the effort. Now that was speed dating. But what has really changed from speed dating back in my day to speed dating now? Other than a change in venue ... nothing. Seems to me regardless of where, when, or how - in the boy-meets-girl effort it is all about the flirt.


Webster's defines flirting as making playful romantic or sexual overtures or to act so as to attract and provoke. In plain English -- to flirt is to dangle the carrot in front of the opposite sex (or same sex if you are so inclined). Flirting is making some overture to let a potential partner know you are approachable.

Think back to grade school dances and picture this: guys on one side of the gym, girls on the other. Typically for those poor guys it was a long walk across the gym floor as VanillaBean and CocoaNut have heard me say a 100 times. Just imagine ... all eyes glued to the brave young soul making the long walk all alone across the gym floor to approach the girl of his dreams. The poor kid crossing the gym floor breaks out in a cold sweat, mouth turns to cotton, and his palms start dripping. He is consumed with thoughts of "will she reject me or follow me out on to the dance floor?” He pictures the long humiliating walk back to the other guys who won't let him live it down if she rejects him. But!!! His minds calms as he sees ... the pretty young lass he is walking towards give him the friendly smile; the slight nod; all with bright shiny eyes. Yep... he's gotten the come hither look and feeling pretty confident he's not going to be rejected. He continues one foot in front of the other --- because he knows this is going to turn out favorable: she's not going to turn him down. Whew! What drama -- but it's the way it is.

Flirting is the one thing that hasn't changed much through the years. Maybe the techniques have changed or have been refined, but the premise is the same: you have to dangle the carrot. A handkerchief dropped at the appropriate time in hopes of some gentleman picking it up and returning may be out of place today. But, hey ... maybe it's worth it to drop your Vera Bradley coin purse? And remember: the giggle, the smile, the arm touch have not changed through the years and still work today. So, the bottom line, I beg you, learn to flirt: http://www.wikihow.com/Flirt or http://www.thirdage.com/dating/the-art-of-flirting. Put yourself out there a bit -- for big pay offs later.